Always My College Girl: Always God's Gift To Me
Welcome...to the only church that Jesus built!
Matthew 16:18-19
And now for 'mom by mom'
If All Else Failed ... !
Jeffrey Richard Wright
Jeff - Jonathan - Stevie
A grayscale range is defined as a spectrum of shades between black and white, where 0 represents pure black and 255 represents pure white, with every other number in between representing different shades of gray.
Jeff (front left)- Jeremy - (top right)
ALL ABOUT YOU!
Bev - Jeff
front walkway
HOME AT LAST
Jeff - Kingston - Jayden - Thorin
Front row left to right:
Back row:
Bev (mom) - Allen (dad) - Jeremy
And now for 'mom' by 'dad'
First of all, thank you Lord Jesus for blessing us with Jeff. And, not only Jeffrey but the many who have entered into our lives as a result of this incredible journey. The Lord gave us this wonderful gift in the soul and person of Jeffrey. Jeffrey's personal mission and message was simple and plain. He called my wife and myself 'mom and dad' from the beginning. He called our three boys his brothers. It started with a program through 'Open Hands' to place some very special people into family settings that they might have some 'family' on a day-to-day basis. In fact thanks to Bev, we were the first family to become a part of this program.
Bev is an amazingly intuitive person and an equally amazing woman dedicated to God first that she may be the best she can be to and for others. That said, it's all to say that she pursued becoming a part of this program with a mission-like passion towards making a difference in somebody else's life. And yes, with the intuition that it would also make a difference in ours. She firmly believed that right to the core of her heart and soul. For myself, I confess to beforehand looking at it a little bit differently. I woud describe myself as wondering about the 'impact'. The impact on my life, my routines, privacy not to mention the make-up of the household. Just how 'disturbing' was this all going to be? Would it turn my world upside-down?
Remember, these feelings were 'prior to' thoughts. In a nutshell, there indeed was an impact, on my life and the household and most certainly it turned a part if the the whole of my life 'upside-down'.
What I discovered was there was a fair part of my life that needed an 'upside-down' adjustment to 'rightside-up'. That's because that part of my life and thinking which I believed was already rightside-up was actually upside down.
Thank you Lord. Thank you Bev. Thank you Jeffery. The very first time Jeff walked into our house, something hit home, when somebody came 'home'. I flashed back to all the times in my broken childhood when I lived in houses but had no home. I flashed forward to what this home could mean to Jeff who had been institutionalized from age 13 to 48. Wow, I may have learned more from Jeff in one meeting than I might teach him in a lifetime. It was and indeed should have been humbling. There's my bad and then there's 'My Bad'. Thank you Lord, thank you Bev, thank you Jeffrey and thank you Open Hands, whom I believe were really looking for 'open hearts'. There's a movie 'Gerry Maguire' in which at one point Tom Cruise (the reluctant husband) makes a lengthy return speech. His wife finally interrupts him to say, "You had me at hello". With Jeffrey it was when we showed him his room and he joyfully asks, "For Me?" "Yes Jeff, for You". Seeing his expression, his countenance and his joy, it was then I knew without a doubt this was meant to be. We had already made a difference in his life. It was already working out. Something my wife well knew even before the journey began. I couldn't help marvel at her and be absolutely in awe of our one and only God. My college girl whom God used to bring me to the 'The Way, The Truth and The Life' (John 14:6) and all of us together. Talk about being 'on the same page'. Talk about 'love at first sight'. An ephiphany of biblical proportions no less.
The truth literally fell into my lap so-to-speak, thanks to my wife. In college, I relished arguing about bible to Bev, her mom and dad when I met them and at my first bible study, with the rest of the future out-laws. Then one day the 'Irish' in Bev Bailey came out swinging. Bev said enough was enough in the most practical way possible. The first and last 'punch' she threw (figuratively) was to toss a bible into my lap saying, "Ok you think you're so smart, save yourself!" Smart gal. My argument was no longer with my fellow man. or fellow future wife. It was with the God who created mankind. Didn't take long to realize I was hopelessly out numbered, soon to realize that 'numbers' don't matter (Romans 8:31; Proverbs 23:23; Judges 7:1-8; John 14:5-7; 8:31-32).
What matters is truth. Yes, you might say the truth fell into my lap and yes I bought into it (John 8:44). People believe a lot of things, hidden lies included, because they can see it. The one Faith isn't blind whatsoever. You can walk by it. Sight is but 'vertical. To go up and beyond. you must go vertical. That's just what Jesus did in His resurrection and He depended on the power of God to do it (Acts 2:22-38 esp., vs 27-28). Buy into the vision instead (2 Corinthians 5:7; Hebrews 11:1-3).
Jeff would look at a family picture with him in it and recite everyone's name. At the end he would say, "and me". If a picture wasn't in sight, he would start reciting anyway. He might miss one here and there but the ending wouldn't change. "And me".
Jeffrey went to his Lord
Monday morning
June 8—2026
About a month before his 60th birthday
All this to say, Jeffrey was anything but grayscale. He expressed his life in black and white. What you saw and heard was what you got. Simple and genuine. He appreciated life, moment to moment, living each to the fullest. Every smile he gave was from the heart. Each emotion he shared, he wore on his sleeve. His treasure was his family, friends and those of us who became family in his new life. No matter what we gave him, he gave back more and what he gave was priceless. What he gave was ‘himself’.
In Jeff's own words and feelings, our sons Joel, Jeremy and Jonathan were his brothers. They treated him in like manner. Jeff would often recite their names in sequence and then add, "and me or "and Jeff" closing off with "that's right". Joel drives a dark blue Dodge Caravan and lives downstairs. Jeff would walk into the living room. look out the big front window and say, "Joel's back". He would repeat it until we acknowledged him as he believed it was important news. Jeff didn't have to try to be funny. He was funny. It didn't matter that most of the times Joel hadn't even left the house yet. It was simply the first time of the day that Jeff noticed the van in the driveway so, it was "Joel's back' and he thought we should know about it.
We, Bev and I, became 'mom and dad' the first time he entered the front door. He became our son. When the three of us went grocery shopping Jeff would introduce us to anyone and everyone who crossed our path as 'mom and dad' with a big smile. The Lord blessed us all with Jeffrey and we not only shared his life and he ours, he allowed, gave us permission to come into his world. He lived moment to moment. We quickly realized that as his world went, so did ours. Nothing was too small. Nothing was unimportant. As my wife Bev put it way back in our first days with Jeffrey,"He makes you appreciate the little things in life, 'cause he does, and he let's you know". Jeffrey died in my arms and passed over into the Lord’s. Till we all meet again son... and we will
GOOD NEWS!
Front Row - Right - 3 Grandkids
Kingston (In Gray )- Jayden (In Black) - Thorin (Gold T-Shirt)
YOUR PLACE TOO!
Jeffrey was a social butterfly. He would sit in front of the house and wave and greet people who walked by. Most, even the kids, would wave back and greet him also. When they did he waved and smiled all the more frantically simply out of sheer joy. About the few who didn't, he figured they had a problem and would say "bad attitude", yet not dwell on it for but a moment and move on. 'They', had a bad attitude. He was no different whether in the grocery store or restaurant. I remember when we went for our first car ride. Off to 'Timmy's' we were. As he got into the passenger side of the car Jeff noticed the 'business' of some birds, smack on the windshield right in front of him. Pointing at the droppings he turns to me and says "birds, bad attitude" and, we moved on.
Jeff solved life's problems three ways.
"If you're sick -
Go to the hospital"
or "Go to the doctor".
He was especially
fond of "If your sick
call the ambulance".
"If you're bad -
(you) Go to jail"
or "Call the police".
"If there's fire -
call the fire truck".
If he said 'one' he said them all.
He would cap it off with "That's right".
Jeff covered all his bases.
AT YOUR SERVICE
Below is Jeff with our son Jonathon, named after David's friend. You know, the 'David' who slew Goliath. If there's one thing you can learn from David, it's that with God's backing success is only a 'stone's throw away. We choose 'Jonathan' because of how loyal a friend he was to God's 'chosen'. If you look to the right you will see a very, very special dog, a certified 'comfort' dog.
'Stevie' is one of the most intelligent dogs ever. When Jon would come down for a visit, Stevie would be right at his side. She would bolt into the house and find anybody and everybody to say hi to, Jeff included. Jeff called her 'puppy'. From the onset after Stevie met Jeff, upon arriving Stevie would first quickly say hi to the rest of us who were around. Then, if Jeff wasn't front and center in a flash she would dash off to Jeff's room track Jeff down, go right into his room, jump on Jeff's bed, where Jeff often was and give Jeff some 'luvin'. In fact the first time and every time you would here Jeff happily shout "puppy... she loves me!" To be sure Stevie loved the attention as in 'back at ya'. We had no doubt Stevie sensed Jeff was 'special'.
The last time when Jon came down for Stevie it was friendship as usual. Stevie ran into Jeff's bedroom... but no Jeff. Immediately she ran through the house looking for Jeff, to no avail. She even ran back into Jeff's room looking for him again. Still no Jeff and it was obvious Stevie sensed something was different. Jeff was always 'here' somewhere and always wore 'puppy' on his sleeve. It was all too obvious Stevie was bewildered.
It wasn't until Jon took Stevie up to the casket and let Stevie 'see and sniff' Jeff that she got 'some form of closure'. In a way that some animals can sense it, Stevie sensed Jeff was gone. I have heard and read about this sort of thing regarding animals but this is the first time experiencing it. It was no surprise to Jon though. Jon made us promise if something ever happened to him and Stevie was still alive, that we would allow Stevie the same consideration. 'Right of passage' so-to-speak. Of course.
Our grandsons became his buddies. When Jeff's mobility was tied more closely to a wheelchair Thor wheelchair - Kingston hug pic - pic of Jeff with grandkids Al and Bev and Jer
To say that Jeffrey was a 'superguy' is an understatement. He loved it when we both wore our superman t-shirts at the same time (usually by purpose). He would love pointing out that both of us were 'superman' the 'two of us' as he would say. He would point to his chest and say, "Me too!" I never told him that his shirt came from Walmart. I also didn't tell him that, it didn't come from Krypton.
My bad.
GET IN TOUCH
Tuesday July 19, 1966 - Monday June 08, 2026
DIRECTIONS
Look at this amazing gal. She exudes 'woman of God, wife, mother, mom, grandma, helpmate'. And, God purposed that we should be together and He made it happen. It is the type of story dreams are made of . In our first year of college
Now picture this galgoing into Jejjrey's room, talking with him, praying with him, affirming her love for him. She knew that for Jeff , who was born with Down Syndrome, would just 'soak it in'. Such care came out in everything she did with and for Jeff . Each meal she prepared for him came from a menu of what can I make for Jeff today that he would really like. As she would figure it out, she would often let me in on whatever it might be with a gleam in her eye. She also knew that this kind of attention, that is, bringing God into the picture, would have a calming affect on Jeffrey while also be the 'signal' to let Jeff know it was time to go to sleep. Frame of mind is such a 'key' and the peace of God that surpasses all understanding is the 'ultimate' turn-key for opening the door to that.
If you understand anything about building confidence and self-esteem or want to understand, than this is for you:
An affirmation is a positive, declarative statement used to validate a fact, offer emotional support, or challenge negative thoughts. It is typically a short phrase repeated regularly to shift mindset, boost self-confidence, and manifest personal goals.
Bev championed confidence, self-esteem and supportiveness in others, always boasting in the Lord. Her mom was the same way and Bev as they say, didn't fall far from the tree.
Now I realize some might say hey, this is reading like it's all about 'dad' inspite of the heading saying 'And now for mom'. I say all this just to explain how wonderful and incredible she has been, is and in the Lord, will always be. If you have to read between the lines to understand, then by all means read between the lines. Sometimes you have to explain 'what isn't' to make clear 'what is' or use as a foundational base for questions asked (Matthew 19: 1-12 esp., vs 3-6). Besides, it's all about God without whom, there would be no me or us or you. (Acts 17:22-31 esp., vs 28). Also, without God the Father, Jesus the Son and the Holy Spirit 'first' there would be no applicable John 3:16-18, for you or anyone to tap into. The serpent of old - the devil; Adam and Eve, put us into this predicament in the beginning by 'not' putting God first. Blessed we are that God gave us, one and all the choice of (and I stress - choice) choosing a path/way back to Him. All religions and denominations, save one) talk the walk one way or another but absolutely do not walk the talk.
As a general rule of thumb, Jesus did that many times as did Paul and others (i.e, Matthew 19:1-4).
Like, substituting the traditions of men for the commands of God (Matthew 15:3-14).
Like, counting old misplaced beliefs as 'rubbish' in order to gain Christ (Philippians 3:7-14).
Is this one of those times? Don't waste, neglect, ignore or throw something away you could have versus clinging to an illusion/delusion of truth, which the doctrines of men are all about. (Hebrews 2:1-4).
Should you not be able to grasp the moment or just don't get it, that's more often than not, a perogative. Doesn't mean you may not regret it. One thing it isn't... 'ok' by any stretch of the imagination.
WELCOME HOME
"And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away."
Then He who sat on the throne said, "Behold, I make all things new." And he showed me a pure river of water of life, clear as crystal, proceeding from the throne of God and of the Lamb.
In the middle of its street, and on either side of the river, was the tree of life, which bore twelve fruits, each tree yielding its fruit every month.
The leaves of the tree were for the healing of the nations.
Revelation 21: 4-5; 22:1-2
Back Row - Middle
Bev (Lady in Red) - Al (Blue Superman)
THE LORD'S DAY
Welcome As We Celebrate God's Gift of Jeffrey
ABOUT US!
When he was able to attend, Jeff loved going to assembly. He loved the singing and though he couldn't read by and large except for things like his name and 'Cornwall' he rolled with what came his way. He would look at his birthday cards or any card sent or given him, holding them so close to his eyes they likely blocked any light needed to even see them. So, true to form undaunted he would pretty much mumble his way through whatever he wanted the cards to say. He was so awesome. Jeff had surgery on his left eye to a cornea. He was supposed to have the right eye done but I suspect the Ottawa specialist figured why bother. Still, they had us go back for annual follow-ups on his left eye but never got arount to the right.
We often marvelled at him. In 'church' Jeff would hold a hymn book. Any and every song to him was 'Jesus Love Me', so that's what he sang. It was a version particulary peculiar to him, bless his soul. He didn't know all the words. If he did he wasn't 'sayin'. However he knew the tune if not all the words of 'Jesus Loves Me'. But he knew the phrase 'Yes, Jesus loves me, the bible tells me so' and that worked for him. That was the totality of the song for him so you would sure hear a fair share of that no matter what lyrics the rest of us were singing. When the song leader would call for all to stand Jeff would often wave his hands in motions conducting us all to the right beat if not the right pitch. He knew how to have a happy time pretty much anytime.
During Lord's Table he was not adverse to looking for the largest 'broken' piece of unleavened bread on the plate. He always thanked the passer. With a big smile on his face he would turn and show us the piece he garnered. There was one time when whomever prepared the communion actually put a whole unbroken 'cracker' on the plate. The passer in starting at the back row afforded Jeff first choice. Sitting beside Jeff as we normally did, we saw Jeff's eye's light up and his beaming big smile said it all. He had hit the jackpot! Yes, he turned and showed us how 'blessed' he was.
Fortunately, whoever prepared it (communion) had put two of the emblems on the plate. Such is the difference between a successful 'pass' and 'not'. In football one would say it was indeed a 'completed pass'. The Lord's Table emblems very emphatically represented 'church' to Jeff. Eventually it got to the point when Jeff was unable to attend. Bev would stay back with him and listen to the study and service from my iPhone to her iPhone. When it was time for the Lord's table, at home she would place the emblem's on the table where Jeff where Jeff was seated. Jeff, recognizing what was before him would say 'church' and partake. Jeff knew how to simplify things to a common denominator suitable to him.
Interesting that I'm using some words here that he would not even linguistically understand. However, he had this unique ability to often reduce concepts and ideas to the level of his own capabilities. That, as a matter of established routine or adjustment. In fact, after so many years with Jeff we knew all his nauances to the point that when he 'adjusted' them as he got older, we adjusted or pre-determined adjustments. If there was a change in his habits including things he couldn't do as well as he could previously, when we offered to help him he would just matter of factly say, "sure". It was his recognition of our recognition that he needed some help. It was also his way of giving us consent, after which he would thank us. In no time over time, we learned the 'language of Jeff'. Some of the PSW's would ask, 'what did he say?' We would then 'translate'. Otherwise, Jeff had a pretty good command of basic communication skills - the like of which were important to him. We as much as possibile encouraged Jeff to be self-reliant and in so doing were expanding his horizons, increasing his self-confidence and self-esteem. True to his own spirit. you would inceasingly hear him say, "I can do it" . Indeed, he could.
Then would come the times he would come to Bev, myself or Joel and say to whomever, "Dad, come here for a minute" or the same to 'mom'. In the same way, when one of us went into his room, he would ask about the 'significant other'. When he thought one of us, including Joel as he lived with us and interacted with Jeff a great deal, was under the weather Jeff would say, "poor mom, or dad or Joel". If he was physically close in proximity to whomever he was talking about, you would feel the touch of his hand on your shoulder. Jeff seemed to get that at times we all needed someone to lean on.
Jeff - Joel
SCRIPTORIALS