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Matthew 16:18-19
Matt 19:1-12
19 Now it came to pass, when Jesus had finished these sayings, that He departed from Galilee and came to the region of Judea beyond the Jordan. 2 And great multitudes followed Him, and He healed them there.
3 The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?"
4 And He answered and said to them, "Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning 'made them male and female,' 5 and said, 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'? 6 So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate."
7 They said to Him, "Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?"
8 He said to them, "Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery."
10 His disciples said to Him, "If such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry."
11 But He said to them, "All cannot accept this saying, but only those to whom it has been given: 12 For there are eunuchs who were born thus from their mother's womb, and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He who is able to accept it, let him accept it."
NKJV
Marriage - Divorce - Remarrying
The discussion to address here is three-fold.
1) Can a husband and wife separate?
2) Can a spouse remarry if the other leaves?
3) Does a spouse have to go back to a first husband?
Gen 2:18-25
18 And the Lord God said, "It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him." 19 Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the air, and brought them to Adam to see what he would call them. And whatever Adam called each living creature, that was its name. 20 So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him.
21 And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. 22 Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.
23 And Adam said:
"This is now bone of my bones
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man."
24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
NKJV
Can you imagine the confusion:
- within a society and culture and marriage relationships
- when people who may have had multiple marriages and wives and children with all,
- having moved on and through many different relationships-
- all of a sudden being told in becoming a Christian,
- that they must now desert their current 'calling' following the 'Gospel call'
- and somehow re-establish a relationship with a first wife who may have also already moved on in a similar manner,
- may not even want to do so,
- may have no interest whatsoever in becoming a Christian,
- may have children whose biological father is someone else-
- and yet those who insist the 'new person in Christ must re-attach themself to a 'heathen or pagan'
- all the while 1 Corinthians 7 allows the unbeliever to 'leave' anyway.
- Isn't it interesting that while such scenarios would have caused and still would cause tremendous indescribable confusion and turmoil within the church then or now- you read nothing in the church writings, 'not a peep' about any command.
- Show me just one example in the New Covenant where a spouse who became a Christian under the New Covenant, had to leave a 'current' spouse and somehow return to a spouse of a 'pre-Christian' relationship?
- I can show you where it does give that instruction to a Christian couple.
- You show me where such instruction or example is given about someone who must abandon their 'current calling' after accepting Christ, becoming a Christian.
- 1 Corinthians 7:24 "Brethren, let each one remain with God in that state in which he was called."
1 Cor 7:17-24
17 But as God has distributed to each one, as the Lord has called each one, so let him walk. And so I ordain in all the churches.
18 Was anyone called while circumcised? Let him not become uncircumcised. Was anyone called while uncircumcised? Let him not be circumcised.
19 Circumcision is nothing and uncircumcision is nothing, but keeping the commandments of God is what matters.
20 Let each one remain in the same calling in which he was called.
21 Were you called while a slave? Do not be concerned about it; but if you can be made free, rather use it.
22 For he who is called in the Lord while a slave is the Lord's freedman. Likewise he who is called while free is Christ's slave.
23 You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men.
24 Brethren, let each one remain with God in that state in which he was called.NKJV
What should that tell you? How about 'be silent where the bible is silent'? Is God the author of Confusion? Or is it man?
Does the fact that both the question and Jesus's answer were both rendered under the Old Covenant have any bearing on the answer given once the New Covenant came into effect? Does anything in the New Covenant take precedence over all or any part of the answer given under the Old Covenent? Can what is said in Matthew 19 be found in the New Covenant to warrant a 'carry over'? Is there any instruction in the New Covenant that becomes a 'major premise' by 'extension' or as a replacement for for any part of the answer Jesus gave?
Let each one remain in the same calling in which he was called.
1 Corinthians 7:20
So where does one start in this discussion?
Traditionally everyone wants to start in Matthew 19:1-6.
However, I believe 'Scripturally' one should be starting here,
1 Corinthians 7:24, "Brethren, let each one remain with God in that state in which he was called."
1 Cor 7:10-28
10 Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. 11 But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife.
12 But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her. 13 And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy. 15 But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace. 16 For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?
Live as You Are Called
17 But as God has distributed to each one, as the Lord has called each one, so let him walk. And so I ordain in all the churches. 18 Was anyone called while circumcised? Let him not become uncircumcised. Was anyone called while uncircumcised? Let him not be circumcised. 19 Circumcision is nothing and uncircumcision is nothing, but keeping the commandments of God is what matters. 20 Let each one remain in the same calling in which he was called. 21 Were you called while a slave? Do not be concerned about it; but if you can be made free, rather use it. 22 For he who is called in the Lord while a slave is the Lord's freedman. Likewise he who is called while free is Christ's slave. 23 You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men. 24 Brethren, let each one remain with God in that state in which he was called.
To the Unmarried and Widows
25 Now concerning virgins: I have no commandment from the Lord; yet I give judgment as one whom the Lord in His mercy has made trustworthy. 26 I suppose therefore that this is good because of the present distress — that it is good for a man to remain as he is: 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be loosed. Are you loosed from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But even if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. Nevertheless such will have trouble in the flesh, but I would spare you.
NKJV
M-D-R
When Jesus was asked whether it was lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason- you know, yesterday's version of today's 'Irreconcilable Differences'. (Irreconcilable: of ideas, facts, or statements) representing findings or points of view that are so different from each other that they cannot be made compatible. Why did Jesus's answer seemingly ignore the question and go straight to the heart of creation and male-female relationship and not address the question itself? In fact was He really ignoring the question? Or, was He saying 'wrong question'? After all, if you want the right answer you must ask the right question.
1 Cor 7:29
39 A wife is bound for as long a time [as] her husband may live; but if the husband shall have died, she is free to be married to whom she wills, only in [the] Lord.
Matthew 19:3-6
3 The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?"
4 And He answered and said to them, "Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning 'made them male and female,'
5 and said, 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'?
6 So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate." NKJV
M-D-R
Now I realize that many, past present and likely future will hang their religious hats on Matthew 19:9 "And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery."
1 Cor 1:1-3
1 Paul, called to be an apostle of Jesus Christ through the will of God, and Sosthenes our brother,
2 To the church of God which is at Corinth, to those who are sanctified in Christ Jesus, called to be saints, with all who in every place call on the name of Jesus Christ our Lord, both theirs and ours:
3 Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. NKJV
If going back to a first husband for those who may have had multiple marriages or wives before becoming Christian was primary and a must after becoming Christian then why is the New Testament Church writings silent on the matter?
Gen 2:4-7
4 This is the history of the heavens and the earth when they were created, in the day that the Lord God made the earth and the heavens, 5 before any plant of the field was in the earth and before any herb of the field had grown. For the Lord God had not caused it to rain on the earth, and there was no man to till the ground; 6 but a mist went up from the earth and watered the whole face of the ground.
7 And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being.
NKJV